Fear Be Gone!

Fear is definitely wasted energy, which was never clearer
than yesterday for me. My biggest fear is the dentist. When I was young I had a
horrible experience with a dentist. It was the kind of experience nightmares
are made of, whirling drills, sucking sounds and high pitched squeals. All the
sounds that make my teeth ache and send shivers up my spine. The dentist
believed no matter the age pain management was not needed. At nine or ten I was
scared. It was my first time having a cavity filled and a straggly tooth pulled.
On top of all that he wouldn’t let my mother be with me during the procedures.
I screamed bloody murder while strapped to the chair and the dentist drilled
and then without warning pulled my tooth. Thirty years later I am still freaked
when I go to the dentist. The smell and sounds take me right back to that awful
chair.

Yesterday was the first time I’d been to the dentist in
three years. It was finally time to walk the walk and smile the smile of a
complete and healthy life. A healthy mouth has a huge impact on health. Our
teeth and gums are linked to our heart health. I arrived early at the office a
terrible habit I have and then waited for too long. I was so nervous that I
couldn’t read my book. Finally I was called to “The Room”. The dental assistant
was sweet almost too sweet that made me more nervous. My pulse quickened and my
palms started to sweat and they never sweat. I stopped at the door to “The
Room” took a deep breath and walked through as I exhaled. The tech or whatever
their title is was wonderful. She put me at ease and cleaned my teeth mindful
of the places I said were sensitive. With in minutes my pulse was normal and I
was okay. I actually smiled…until the doctor was called to finish the exam. It
took a few minutes and I heard whatever machine makes that awful shrill sound
and almost bolted through the window that was directly in front of me. But I
thought, “My kids will be here this afternoon and that might embarrass them.” I
never thought it would embarrass me because the fear consumed my rational
thinking. My pulse went from a resting rate of 68 to 125 in the span of 20
seconds. Deep breaths didn’t work this time. The dentist saw my panic and
stopped to just talk to me. It worked and I was able to collect my panic and
stuff it away. My newly trimmed fingernails left half moon marks on my palms while
I retreated to my happy place.  

And here’s why I believe fear is wasted energy and time. My
check up went amazingly well and there was nothing major wrong with my teeth.
Nothing terrible happened; I was told I had great teeth and great bone health.
This dentist is not the mad dentist from my childhood. I lost sleep and way too
much time worrying what would happen. What a waste. Hopefully when May 24^th
approaches I won’t freak and if I start I’ll remember the painless exam of
yesterday.

Until next time, live well now.